True Confessions

So they say that confession's good for the soul. My soul could use some salvation and/or some salve, so let's get this out of the way, shall we?

1) I was on man hiatus b/c I had a really weird, uncomfortable internet date. I guess the confession is that I've been going on internet dates. Maybe the blog will get interesting again, hm?

2) The verb in that sentence is *was*.

3) I'm totally and completely addicted to Top Chef. I've watched 4 seasons in the past two weeks.

4) I'm terrified of my garbage disposal.

5) Also of escalators.

6) I keep buying underwear so I don't have to do laundry.

7) I've developed a weakness for shoes with 3.5" heels & higher. I ended up picking orders in my warehouse for 3 hours today. I can't feel my toes, but I'm sort of happy about this because I suspect that, when the feeling comes rushing back, the feeling will be pain.

8) The couchsurfer told me that the reason he doesn't want to fuck me is b/c I don't smell good. This has made me vaguely insecure about the way I smell, so when I meet you I will hope and pray that you smell me and enjoy the experience.

9) It's 8:05pm and I kind of just want to take my glass of wine to bed and watch more top chef.

10) I recently had an exceptionally filthy dream about Sam from Season Two. Look at him, though. Who wouldn't?

Sundae afternoons....

So I finally met the blogfather. He said to me.. "Do you like Elvis Costello?" I said yes, but I'm disappointed that he married Diana Krall, because I love my Canadian girls, but she's as whitebread middle america as they come. She's no Canadian girl, thrust up from the permafrost screaming for sunshine and heat and passion. She was born in.... Arizona where the temps are a steady 98 degrees all day long - not hot enough for a boil. Just hot enough for a boy band.

So yeah, I met his highness and it's probably about time 'cause there's been a few craigslist connections, but shit doesn't happen 'til it's time, right.

It's probably time.