after movie thinkin'

so mikeb and i (along with a friend of his) went to see alfie last night, then for drinks and a bite to eat after. i really liked it - i like jude law (mmmmm jude law) and i loved the way that the costume designer integrated the look and feel of the original film through the clothing and makeup of the characters, particularly the female characters. it was stylish and well put together.

the mood of the group, however, was quiet after the film - mike b found it depressing cause there were no answers - it's just a snapshot of his life and, at the end, he continues on. there's no resolution - it doesn't show you that he ends up in love with a beautiful woman and wonderful friends. and, to an extent, i can really relate to this. i fully embrace the idea that i'm single, and free, and answer to no one. but, at the end of the day, will i be going home alone to my studio apartment and have no one to spend christmas with? i've spent some serious time thinking about this stuff.. i really miss the companionship and connection you get when you are in a relationship. you can have it, to a certain extent, with your closest friends - and there are levels of intimacy that you reach with your friends that you may not reach with your boy/girlfriend - but there's a deeper connection when you add the sexual contact - when you bond yourselves physically as well as emotionally. and i miss having that bond, the easy physical contact. and, let's not kid, i really really like sex. everything about sex - especially when it's of the 'often' and 'good' variety.

where am i going with this post? nowhere i guess. the film jus got me thinking. i like the idea of going home to someone. i like the idea of being out dancing with my girls and struggling home to crawl into bed to someone who's been waiting for me to do just that. bleh. weird - i'm lonely and yet i'm not. i'm feeling disconnected, but last weekend, when i was visiting with lemon and lime, i felt totally at home. i get that sense of belonging with my friends - maybe it's just the sex i miss.