it's 9.30-ish on a friday night. i'm lying in my bed with pigtails in, wearing a pair of baby blue shorty shorts and a matching camisole. i've got a big ol' glass of 50/50 raspberry vodka & pellegrino limonata over ice. i'm getting myself drunk with the intent of taking advantage of myself later. five bucks says i don't call myself until the next time i'm looking for a little girl on girl self love. but you know, i always call... eventually... 'cause dammit i'm good. i know just how much pressure to apply where - how fast to go - how slow - when to just pull my hands away (i like to be teased) - when to play with my nipples and how hard i like them squeezed...
but i digress.
i've been warned that i may receive a booty call a little later on. depending on how much vodka i drink, i may accept. i'm a real tart when i drink, see, but god knows whether or not i'll be in any state to drive. everyone i know has gone to see the black eyed oh-please tonight. catchy enough folks, but seriously the only real reason for going would be to hit on fergie. r-a-A-W-w-r. my colleague asked me today why chicks dig fergie (i guess his wife's a fan). my theory (and everyone knows i rule, so i must be correct) is that she's feminine - girly, even - but doesn't give the impression that she's a princess. same as gwen stefani. she's hot and she's totally girly, but you know she can still roll with the boys - get dirty, hang out, drink beer, and talk shit with the best of 'em. (i'm taking a page from german's book with the images. you know, just 'cause with women this hot it'd be a damn shame to not shine a light, know what i'm saying?) that's kind of what i aspire to. let's not kid - i'm a girly girl. i have french manicured toes right now (i did 'em myself, fyi. i *hate* it when people touch my feet (The New Boy could touch my feet right off the bat. wierd.)) my hair is in PIGTAILS, for chrissake, and i smell like mango body butter - i'm a GIRL..... mmm me and fergie and gwen in a bed. how fun would *that* be? wow.
(hey sweetie... how're you feeling tonight? can i refresh your drink? mmm you look like you have really soft lips. can i kiss them... just, you know, to see? - whoa down there baby. take your time. we got all night. no need to rush into anything. i know what you're looking for, and i guarantee you'll get more than you bargained for. you gotta play the game though. it's way more fun that way)
where was i? oh ya - a few years ago, i re-embraced the fact that i'm a girl. see, when you are doing women's studies & stuff, it's easy to get caught up in the 'no makeup natural woman' feminist thing. that doesn't have to be the case though, i figure. i mean, part of being a feminist should mean that if i want to show off my tah-tahs and wear heels and shimmery green eyeshadow if i feel like it, goshfukkit. of course, i could be wrong. i just don't really give a shit.
and that's the other side of it, i guess - i don't give a shit if people talk 'cause i dress like a girl. i'm feminine but i can TOTALLY hang with the boys - i always have, and i probably always will. ooo my tits are slipping out of my top. i'm so wanton sometimes. who'm i kidding? it's like they have a mind of their own, i swear. they just want to be played with. The New Boy doesn't play *nearly* enough attention to my tits. we'll have to talk about that. they feel a little neglected. (it's ok babies - i'll take care of you soon. you know i will...)
ok i'm giving myself the eye - i need a new drink and some serious attention, or i'm not going to get anywhere with myself tonight. forgive me, guys, but a girl's gotta get some, you know?
We’re not going anywhere.
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