tonight i feel like staying at home in bed talking to you, drinking wine, and watching hockey. is that ok? oh man i've screwed up the image upload 2x and i've only had two glasses of wine. this bodes poorly for the quality of this post. i apologize in advance. that's morning me, by the way, in case you wanted to know in advance what i look like when i first get up. there is no colour until i've had coffee. usually i'm wearing jammies, but i was having crazy dreams last night and when i woke up my shirt was on the other side of the room. they weren't dirty dreams, either - they were more conflict dreams. for some reason i was the only person who knew how to get a hold of tnb's best friend, and tnb had to come to see me to get his phone number but i wouldn't give it to him 'cause i was pissed still at him for disappearing off the face of the earth. so he was mad at me and i was mad at him and all i could say to him was "i don't want to be the girl you call every ten years when you are leaving a fucked up relationship. i'm not here to fuck your issues away." my dream-self sure did do a good job of sticking up for me.
now if only she'd wake up someday and do it for real.
and yes i do almost always sleep with the world's oldest laptop (pictured above(usually not open, though, unless i fall asleep chatting with someone. (which has happened.))). that, a remote control, my crackberry, and my cellphone. no men, sadly,
though the carboy did come crawl into bed with me to watch tv the other night while he waited to go pick his brother up at hockey. the other side of my bed is generally considered auxiliary closet space.the carboy is an interesting person to spend time with. he's five years younger than me and earns five times more. he's super nice, is a good kisser, has the softest skin ever, but is never around. it's 'cause he works like he's forty, he says, but it's what he has to do if he wants to retire at 35. he's also gone to florida for a weekend but is supposed to come back and take me out for dinner on monday. would you believe that we've gone for drinks a billion times. we've driven aimlessly through rainstruck nights talking and listening to the radio. he's seen me naked twice. we've never gone out for dinner or done anything remotely 'normal'. funny, huh?
i'm trying to think of 'when i was young' stories for nk, but i'm having trouble with it for some reason. it's not that i don't *have* stories, it's that it is somehow difficult to siphon it into a coherent narrative. maybe once i have some more wine.
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