better now, thanks

ok this is my SECOND attempt at this post (stupid blogger), which has me feeling a little angry again. but anyway.

after confirmation of my 'bad sexy'(was there ever any doubt?) a loverly lunch with the kiddo (mmm jerk tofu roti mmm), a pit stop at a jewish bakery for chocolate babka (can't beat a babka!), a little work, and a bit of a nap on the couch, i'm feeling more my chipper sundae self.

i took advantage of our lunchtime adventure to have a bit of a 'mom' talk with the kiddo. i wanted to talk to him about his attitude toward school, and about thinking about what he wants to do with his life. he figures that he's got two and a half years to figure it out, and knows he's going to change his mind ten times before he graduates. i think i spoke well when i told him that thinking about what he likes to do, and trying to see if there is a way to make money doing it isn't the same as committing yourself (*shudders* - commitment. eek!) to something. it's actually about having a goal to work towards. and, most of the time, when you are working towards that goal, doors that you never even knew existed pop out of the woodwork on every side.

on another, similar but really different, note, i'm surprised that this article didn't inspire more discussion. as a (fairly young) mom of a teenager, i can fully understand the desire to relate to your kid, and understand their likes and dislikes. i really like the fact that i know the 'freaky-deaky' slang he uses, and even what it means. i like the fact that i can shop for him, and he will like what i choose. i know he admires my sense of style - not that common in a parent/teen relationship. i even *listen* to half of the music he listens to - we regularly introduce each other to new songs, bands, genres. and i know that he smokes weed (or 'chron' as they call it) with his buddies. i know he drinks beer on the weekend. however, he knows that i have a problem with it. i try and walk the fine line where my concern is apparent, but he still feels like he can come to me without me getting all judgemental and shutting down my 'listening' in order to be a strict parent..

that said, i still have a responsibility to help guide my child in the rough decisions he has to make as a kid. i still have a responsibilty to cherish and protect and assist him in making healthy choices. i don't think that woman has done this - it is possible to avoid falling into the 'black and white' boxes of the parent and child relationship while still holding onto some of the 'parental' duties. supplying your kids with drugs and sleeping with their friends is not the way to go about it.

god knows i'm fighting my maturity with sharp sticks and a slingshot, but i still think that there is a time to take the high ground. kids, much as they'd like to believe the opposite, don't have the knowledge and the experience to make the best decisions. hell, neither do i, sometimes. but it's up to me, as a mom, to try and do the best i can at being the gps system of life, for at least one person, for at least a little while. i mean, come on. that's what friends do - can't a parent do that at the very least?