it's like i'm psychic, dude

ok remember my emo-ness of the other day? don't let anyone ever tell you that i'm not totally psychic. in chatting with the chef today it came out that he's not interested in being my boyfriend, he's only looking for a casual hookup. so the question is do i WANT another casual hookup, or do i want to tell him to go fuck himself?

furthermore, what the fuck is it with me and finding these men who are just looking for a fuck? like what is it about me? how do i attract them from miles around? i've got some kind of homing device on my ass i swear to god.

like is it really too much to ask to want to meet a guy who isn't looking for a once in a while hookup? is it too much to ask to want to hang out with a guy who actually wants to know *me* - to hang out with *me* not to just fuck some chick with nice tits and a bit of a personality?

i'm a nice person. i'm kind and sweet and caring and fun, and i'm smart and a good cook and i just happen to be into sex too. i think i deserve to meet someone who can appreciate all of those things about me. don't i? is it really too much to ask?